Posts Tagged Religion

Malaysia IS a country?

I can almost imagine what goes on in the minds of people who made those searches:

Hmm.. Malaysia? Vaguely familiar name. Let’s see which country it’s in..
Oh wait.. You mean to tell me Malaysia IS a country?

Seriously? 165,000,000 results for “Malaysia is in which country”?

Also note Malaysia is/is not an Islamic Country

Also note Malaysia is/is not an Islamic state

Also interesting is the Islamic state search results. 3.93 million results for “Malaysia is an Islamic state” versus 1.03 million for “Malaysia is not an Islamic state”. I have less faith in Malaysia now.

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Ridiculous Religion Site Stupid

Ever since Wordpress supported tags, we have been tagging each post because we believe it’s a better way to organise and find things that way compared to the archaic Categories (which I would add we still use as if they were tags). Over the years we have used quite a number of tags, and Wordpress has a sidebar widget to automatically change the font size of the tags according to the times it is used. See the sidebar if you don’t understand.

Admittedly, we have talked about religion on this blog quite a lot, and our love for the Pastafarianism religion and the Flying Spaghetti Monster is quite evident. Perhaps then, by divine intervention, the tags have aligned themselves together to create a powerful message for all to see, although those tags were never used in tandem.

Of course they are

As if FSM is not ridiculous

Now THAT is what we call a message from God. We particularly like the part where Stupid were the most emphasised of all. A “Rediculous Religion Site Stupid” example would be “The Church of the Whale Penis” known to us many years ago. No, I AM deadly serious:

Yes, it's huge.

Yes, it's huge.

But perhaps one of the MOST ridiculous thing (even by crazy “Whale-penisism” standard) we have came across is from a book we got from a booth of an Islamic RMIT student association spreading the word of Islam, supposedly. We have a terribly good laugh looking at the so-called evidence of God in Quran, and forgot about it – until we rediscovered it online. Apparently the whole book is for all to see online.

Image from Pharyngula blog, originally from A Brief Illustrated Guide to Understanding Islam

Image from Pharyngula blog, originally from A Brief Illustrated Guide to Understanding Islam

No, we are serious – the book compared the embryo to a “chewed substance” or a piece of chewing gum with teeth marks in it and call that evidence of the miracles in the Holy Quran. Now THAT is “Rediculous Religion Site Stupid”.

The next stage mentioned in the verse is the mudghah stage. The Arabic word mudghah means “chewed substance.” If one were to take a piece of gum and chew it in his or her mouth and then compare it with an embryo at the mudghah stage, we would conclude that the embryo at the mudghah stage acquires the appearance of a chewed substance. This is because of the somites at the back of the embryo that “somewhat resemble teethmarks in a chewed substance.”

Intrigued, we decided to do some research on that phrase in the Holy Quran. We referred to at least five translations, in English and Malay, of that specific phrase in the Holy Quran. We are not at all proficient in the Islamic religion, which is why we used translation. And all translations point to one conclusion – that the Embryo-Gum metaphor is totally ridiculous. All of them made more sense (even scientifically speaking) than the said metaphor.

Man We did create from a quintessence (of clay); Then We placed him as (a drop of) sperm in a place of rest, firmly fixed; Then We made the sperm into a clot of congealed blood; then of that clot We made a (foetus) lump; then we made out of that lump bones and clothed the bones with flesh; then we developed out of it another creature. So blessed be Allah, the best to create!

Now, we are not even sure if the book, in print and in online form, is a parody of the religion, or do some Muslim take them for Quranic miracles. We don’t even know if the RMIT Islamic students read and understood what they were handing out freely that day. I am sure they should have checked the facts, or at least the translation in the books, lest they misled people like me.

P.S.: We are not “bashing” Islam. We are just bashing some bad translation of the Quran.

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How do people find our site?

After a long hiatus, this series is back. This post, however, will just be a short one, serving as a teaser of things to come.

Seriously F-up

Seriously F-up

Let’s see where this visitor came from then:

IP blurred for his sake.

IP blurred for his sake.

The Verizon hostname and the browser language flag should be a dead give away – that is to say, the visitor is an Amerifag (to use his/her choice of language), more commonly known as Americunt (Yes, it’s an Internet lingo). The IP address indicated that the visitor is from a small town in north-eastern United States.

It’s a little ironic that the keyword search landed on a category page for racism, as if his God was trying to lead him there. That should teach him/her a lesson or two about respect, xenophobia, and homosexuality.

More importantly though, I didn’t know one could find this site on the first page of Google Images search results using the keywords “allah is fag”. What that American visitor was trying to find, in Google Images no less, about THAT though,  continues to baffle me.

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Astrology to gain legal recognition in Kelantan.

Kelantan plans to table a bill which will give legal recognition to Astrology. It has been reported by The Star that this bill on Astrology will be used to determine the direction of the Kaabah.

Astrology to gain legal recognition.

Astrology to gain legal recognition.

“The move by the Kelantan government can be seen as a hit in the face to the modern understanding of Astronomy, or even the use of GPS,” said WhatTheToot Advisor on Scientific Affair, Toot.

However, there are others who celebrate the move by the Kelantan government. “It is time Astrology is given the recognition that it deserves. The day the bill is passed is the day of celebration for all Astrology activist!” said WhatTheToot Advisor on Supposed-Crazy-Beliefs, Toot.

It should be noted that WhatTheToot advisors are really the same person. Toot suffers from multi-personality disorder which is a disease which causes many people to say one thing, but act another way.

- Reported by WhatTheToot Mythology Believer, Toot.

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Of God and Penis

After I watched a very interesting video on YouTube, I read some of the comments just to see the average mentality of the YouTube commentators. Normally this concists of things like “First”, “LOL”, “STFU” or more vulgar comments with even worse grammar. However, since this was quite a long, serious and scientific video, the comments were not too bad.

The topic suddenly switch to the gender of god. A commentator claims if God created Adam in his image, God must have a penis. Someone replied, and I thought its one of the funniest and intelligent comments I have seen yet. So good, in fact, I voted it up.

In case you didn’t know which one is it, here’s the comment reproduced:

If God has a penis then ipso facto there must be a Mrs. God, otherwise what the hell’s his penis for?

The comment just goes to prove how absurd and useless it is to talk about the gender of God, and in fact, God itself.

Oh you didn’t find that funny? STFU!

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